Mutual Wanting in Human--AI Interaction: Empirical Evidence from Large-Scale Analysis of GPT Model Transitions

Abstract: The rapid evolution of LLMs creates complex bidirectional expectations between users and AI systems that are poorly understood. We introduce the concept of "mutual wanting" to analyze these expectations during major model transitions. Through analysis of user comments from major AI forums and controlled experiments across multiple OpenAI models, we provide the first large-scale empirical validation of bidirectional desire dynamics in human-AI interaction. Our findings reveal that nearly half of users employ anthropomorphic language, trust significantly exceeds betrayal language, and users cluster into distinct "mutual wanting" types. We identify measurable expectation violation patterns and quantify the expectation-reality gap following major model releases. Using advanced NLP techniques including dual-algorithm topic modeling and multi-dimensional feature extraction, we develop the Mutual Wanting Alignment Framework (M-WAF) with practical applications for proactive user experience management and AI system design. These findings establish mutual wanting as a measurable phenomenon with clear implications for building more trustworthy and relationally-aware AI systems.